Car Seat Myths Busted

Parents often debate when it’s safe, or necessary, to turn their little one’s front facing in their car seat, or when they officially outgrow their infant seat. There are common concerns that cause parents to turn their child around before it’s fully safe to do so. The article below addresses 7 most common concerns, which they call myths (because some are, though believable!). These myths are:

Myth #1: My child is too big!

Myth #2: My child’s legs are too long!

Myth #3: My child is SO uncomfortable!

Myth #4: My car is too small!

Myth #5: My toddler hates rear facing!

Myth #6: My child gets carsick!

Myth #7: Extended rear facing seats are so expensive!

Myth #8: My pediatrician said it’s fine.

To get the answers to these questions, and find out why they’re fiction not fact, view original post.

How to be assertive with your child’s doctor

Taking your infant or toddler to the doctor can be scary for so many reasons. Doctors know more about medicine than you do, their directions seem so inflexible, and at most pediatricians nowadays, the wait before and after means that even if they’re not rushed by the time your sick little one gets seen, you are! Here are a few steps to help make sure that your child receives the best care, and that you’re on the same page as his doctor.

Keep a notepad for each child’s doctor visits. Write down any questions that you have in between appointments, to ask next time. If your child is sick, write down temperatures, symptoms, and the time and date that you noticed them. Write down any instructions you receive for medication, food steps, or other medical issues. With these notes, you can track your child’s wellness, notice patterns, and be sure you don’t forget the questions that you wanted to make sure were addressed.
You are your child’s parent, not the doctor. While the doctor may know best for medical advice overall, you are your child’s biggest advocate. You are with her day in and out, know his normal behaviors, and have the parental gut instinct. Not every doctor will catch an issue the first time around, and it’s okay to go back and get a second opinion, or make the doctor double check. My 13 month old daughter developed a fever, and her pediatrician checked her ears and said they were clear as a bell and beautiful. Later that day, we were still worried, and took her into the local ER. One medical student and one resident checked her ears and said she was fine, but wanted a chest x-ray to check for pneumonia. That came out clean, but they still passed us on to a senior doctor, who took one quick look in my daughter’s over-prodded, sensitive ears and said “Wow, there’s a raging infection, in both ears!” If we had not kept pushing, we wouldn’t have been able to treat or comfort her properly.
Be informed. Dr. Innessa Donskoy, Pediatric Resident at University of Illinois at Chicago, reminds parents to “be open to [doctor’s] suggestions.” Keep in mind, though, that they are suggestions. There’s nothing wrong with taking the prescription you were given and plugging it into Google, or asking your social network if they’ve had experiences with it before. Be an informed consumer. Make sure you follow up with your child’s doctor and/or pharmacist regarding any changes to their instructions, before you make the change—some changes recommended by homeopaths and old wives’ tales actually contribute to the weakening effect of some antibiotics—but it is important to be an educated consumer. As well, look up the vaccination list to know what your doctor will most likely be automatically recommending, or what may be required for day care. Here is the CDC’s list: http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/schedules/
Be on time and prepared. We know, it’s not fair, you always get kept waiting anyway. But part of the reason is the 5- and 10-minutes late that some people, particularly in the beginning of the day, run for their appointments. The more on-schedule, or even early, you are for your appointment, the more fluidly the doctor’s (and thereby your) day runs! Make sure you have all required information, such as your ID and your child’s insurance card, ready for check-in, and that your child is wearing clothing that is easy to maneuver in for weighing, the stethoscope, blood draws/vaccinations, and whatever other procedures are scheduled for this visit. Also, Dr. Meghna Nayak of Newkirk Family Health Center says, “parents often have a lot of little concerns when they come in, but what we need to know is, what’s your main concern, what’s the one thing that brought you in today.” While the other concerns are, of course, important, it’s easiest for your child’s pediatrician to check for the immediate need when a parent can articulate it clearly.
Don’t bring them in on the first day. If your child is sick and has no or a low-grade fever, but is generally healthy, is keeping down fluids, has regular wet diapers or is regularly urinating, and is relatively good-natured, don’t bring them in to the doctor’s office! Attending pediatrician at Maimonides Medical Center in Brooklyn, NY, Dr. Ravi Saksena says, “Usually, these things are viral anyway and there’s not much we can do other than recommend over-the-counter medication for reducing the fever and pain. Bringing your child in on the first day of illness only exposes them and others to more germs in our waiting rooms.” It’s okay to wait out a cold with a few days at home and some chicken soup plus over the counter pain relievers, and not step foot into the pediatrician’s office. He does mention, however, that if breathing becomes labored, your child isn’t taking fluids or urinating, or you’re concerned there’s a medical emergency, skip the pediatrician entirely and head straight to the emergency room! And if it’s been a few days and you’re getting concerned, you can always call your pediatrician or schedule an appointment.
Keep up with physicals and well-visits. The best way to be able to be assertive with your child’s doctor, and a strong partner in your child’s care, is to develop a relationship with your child’s pediatrician. Bringing your child in for their physicals and well-visits is imperative in her ability to develop a relationship with the doctor (even if it’s a practice, and you don’t always see the same doctor), and, perhaps more importantly, “allows us to keep tabs on if the kids are meeting their developmental milestones and how their nutrition is going, helps us figure out how the child is growing instead of doing everything all at once when they come in sick,” says Dr. Nayak. Basically, bringing your baby in for her checkups helps the doctors to establish a “normal” for their patient!
Understand antibiotic use. Antibiotics only treat bacterial infections. Most colds and a number of ear infections are caused by viruses, which can’t be treated with amoxicillin or other antibiotics. It’s cold and flu season; most kids are going to catch a cold in daycare and most runny noses are caused by viral infections. If your baby has a fever with their runny nose, you should keep them home. But, if your little one’s daycare has a policy that, even in the absence of a fever, runny nosed kids must be on antibiotics to attend, DON’T go running to the doctor for antibiotics and insist on receiving them! They most likely won’t treat the cold, this contributes to antibiotic resistance, and many antibiotics have side effects like diarrhea, which can contribute to spreading of any virus. For more information on the over-prescribing of antibiotics, check out this WebMD article.

ALL MY CHILDREN DAYCARE AND NURSERY SCHOOL OPENS IN LOWER MANHATTAN

All My Children Daycare and Nursery School opened its lower Manhattan location on Ridge Street in October in response to a high demand for its services. The day care and nursery center aims to provide young children a safe home-away-from-home that prepares them for school and life readiness in an eco-conscious environment.

All My Children Daycare and Nursery School offers programs for children ages 5 and younger, including infant and toddler care programs, preschool, and Universal Pre-K. These programs are an adaptive system, meaning it changes with the child’s developmental needs as he or she grows older.

To start children ages 6 months to 2 years on the path to learning, the infant and toddler programs introduce routines to teach focusing practices and prepare children for higher learning. This program’s activities include dabbling in art and exploring sand and water.

In the preschool and Universal Pre-K, 2- to 5-year-olds are provided with six different learning centers, which allow them to explore and be creative while learning. These centers include the Art, Library, Dramatic Play, Sand and Water, Blocks, and Discovery, which is stocked with tools such as magnifying glasses, balance scales, and other tools that allow children to explore the outside world.

All My Children Daycare and Nursery School is an eco-friendly environment. All classrooms are furnished with eco-friendly furniture, an interactive gardening system incorporated into program curriculum, and a wall gardening system to set the stage for the day care’s learning environment. Each classroom is equipped with green materials including organic, locally-sourced foods, toxic-free paints, and eco-friendly diapering. Gardens are used to teach planting and important facts about the ecosystem.

For this year only, enrollment is open through June.

View this Original Article, where All My Children Daycare and Nursery School was featured in NY Metro Parents.

How to Deal with Toddler Tantrums

Why Is My Child Tantruming?

A toddler temper tantrum can come on suddenly and strong. On the blog Reasons My Son is Crying, parents make light of the fact that anything from soup being served in the wrong bowl to hair falling in eyes can set a little one off. Young children aged 1 to 3 are particularly prone to tantrums.

Don’t panic that your angel is turning into a tyrant! Take comfort; at this age, your child is most likely not throwing a fit to manipulate you. While still in this learning-how-to-talk phase, children don’t have a firm grasp of translating emotions and desires into words, and this is frustrating, which leads to meltdowns.

Seven Tips for Handling a Temper Tantrum:

1. Keep your cool. Temper tantrums can range from incessant whining and crying to kicking, screaming, and pounding the floor, all the way to hitting, throwing objects, and holding her breath until she’s turning blue. We know it’s difficult to handle, but you can rest easy that even holding his breath is within the normal range of behavior for a mid-tantrum child.

When your toddler is in full swing tantrum mode, he can’t process reasoning, though he will respond – negatively – to your threatening or yelling. “I found the more I shouted at Brandon to stop, the wilder he would get,” comments one tot mom. She discovered that what worked for them instead was to sit down and just be together through his fit.

As a general rule, staying with your child through her tantrum is a good idea. Stomping away can make her feel abandoned. The mass of emotion he’s feeling can be frightening, and knowing you’re nearby is a source of comfort.

If you find your frustration overwhelms you, it may help to calmly leave the room, after making sure it’s a safe space or someone else is watching your child, for a short while and returning after he has stopped crying. By staying (or only showing) calm, you’ll help her calm down, too.

Occasionally, a well-placed time-out can be an effective solution, too. Trial and error might seem like the longest way, but it’s the best way to discover which approach is best for your child and your family. Whichever method you choose, consistency is the key to continued success.

2. Don’t forget that you are the adult. Regardless of how long the tantrum lasts, you should not cave to unreasonable demands, nor attempt negotiations with your shrieking toddler. It can be especially tempting to give in in order to end a public episode. Focus on the long-term goals in raising your child and setting clear boundaries, and ignore strangers’ reactions; every parent is well seasoned in this phase. If you concede, you’re tot learns the lesson that pitching a fit is an effective way to get her demands met, setting the stage for more conflicts in the future. Also, remember, she is already frightened because she feels out of control. What she most needs is the security of knowing that you, in fact, ARE in control–and that means boundaries and consequences.

In public, be prepared for quick–if temporary–escapes with your child until he can calm down.

3. Use time-outs sparingly. For some little ones, introducing a time-out occasionally, starting around 18 months, may help manage feelings better during a tantrum. A time-out can be an effective technique with an especially intense tantrum, when other techniques aren’t working. A quiet or boring spot is sometimes the best lesson in self-soothing. Suggested time: about one minute per year of age.

Explain the time out in simple words, letting her know where she’s going, why she needs space away, and that it’s not a punishment, but a chance to decompress. If he leaves the time-out spot, replace him kindly but firmly, and make sure not to interact with him or give him any attention, even negative, but stay close by. Of course, make sure she’s safe, but otherwise, even leaving the corner should be a quick, simple, no-talking interaction.

4. Have a conversation later. After the tantrum ends, it’s time for a little snuggle and conversation. Use very simple terms to talk about her behavior, and acknowledge and validate her frustration. Now is a good time to introduce and reinforce emotion words, and tie her feelings to the events that preceded them, with phrases like “You were disappointed and frustrated that it wasn’t time to feed the kitty, and you couldn’t help out.” Make it clear that learning to express himself with words, he’ll get the results he wants, faster. With a calm, gentle voice and expression, you can say, “I’m sorry I didn’t understand you. Now that you’re not screaming, I can find out what you want.”

5. Verbally reinforce your unconditional love. After the storm has subsided and you two have had the chance to chat, a little bit of physical affection and verbal reaffirmation will help seal the deal and keep your tot calm. This is rewarding the good behavior of your child managing to soothe himself and talk with you, as well as increasing feelings of security and predictability.

6. Prevent fit-prone situations before they start. Notice what situations send your child overboard, and plan accordingly. If hunger turns him into a monster, bring snacks wherever you go. If the late afternoon is a cranky-fest, keep your running around to earlier in the day, and keep the afternoon clear for undisturbed nap or quiet time. If transitions between activities are the instigator,a gentle warning before a change may avert a pending crisis. A simple announcement of the change to the next event allows her the chance to adjust rather than react.If you sense a tantrum coming, distracting your tot can make all the difference. Change locations, find a toy, or just do something unexpected, like make a silly face or sing the ABCs.

Remember, too, that your child’s job right now is to grow in independence, so offering choices is great for teaching self-determination AND avoiding fits. I don’t know anyone who likes always being told what to do. A simple “Should we go for a walk or play roll the ball?” instead of “Play with your toys” can help him properly develop a sense of control, thereby minimizing tantrums.

Keep track of the frequency of your “no” responses. Use that word too often, and you’re most likely stressing both of you out, so pick your battles wisely.

7. Keep an eye out for signs of overstress. While even daily tantrums are perfectly normal for the mid-toddler years, you should still be vigilant for potential problems. Any large stressors that would impact a teen or adult will most likely have the same affect on a toddler. If things have been very busy lately, or the child’s parents or role models are constantly disagreeing, misbehavior might point to a child’s difficulty handling the stressful world around him, indicating issues adults might not even otherwise recognize.

Babycenter.com experts weigh in; “If your child’s tantrums seem overly frequent or intense (or he’s hurting himself or others), seek help. Your doctor will discuss your child’s developmental and behavioral milestones with you at routine well-child checkups. These visits are good opportunities to talk about concerns you have about your child’s behavior, and they help to rule out any serious physical or psychological problems. Your doctor can also suggest ways to deal with the outbursts.

“Also, talk to your doctor if your child has frightening breath-holding spells when he gets upset. There’s some evidence that this behavior is linked to an iron deficiency.”

View Original Post on BabyCenter.com

How to Childproof for a Walker

Is your toddler finally toddling? Congratulations! Take those first steps a sign to check if you need to step up your game in toddler-proofing. So where to begin? Debra Holtzman, author of The Safe Baby: A Do-It-Yourself Guide to Home Safety and Healthy Living, believes it’s important to start by seeing what your child sees. “Get down on your hands and knees to get a bird’s eye view of the problems.”

Founder of SafetyMom.com Alison Rhodes, who also operates Tri-State area child-proofing business, mentions that natural curiosity will make your little one pull everything within reach. “So be mindful of window cords, curtains, and tablecloths. Baby’s new exploring skills mean you should also be extra-careful to close doors to rooms that are off-limits,” she says. A convenient and inexpensive alternative to door knob covers (if you have round knobs rather than levers or handlesets) is old socks, which can be placed over the knob to make them difficult for a baby to grasp.

That’s just the beginning. To see more, click here.

Transitioning to Solids

You’ve determined that your baby should begin to eat solid foods; now you’re wondering, what should I feed her?

Rice cereal is a classic first, but some parents like to get creative as soon as their babies seem ready. Here are some inspiring ideas for fun first foods.

Making Your Own Baby Food

You don’t need to be intimidated by the idea of making your own baby food. It’s the simplest cooking you will ever do, and allows you control over the ingredients (and amount of sugar, salt, and fat) in your child’s meals. Jars and pouches are convenient, but more expensive than homemade, and you’ll find less variety and more wasteful packaging on the shelf.

Many moms use a blender for pureeing cooked foods, but you can also just use a fork to mash them up thoroughly. You can prepare these simple purees just for your baby and introduce new foods one at a time to monitor for allergic reactions, but once you’ve determined that allergies are not an issue, an even easier approach is to blend or mash up whatever the rest of the family is eating. One mom favorite is to puree pasta primavera or chicken with veggies — just about anything that’s soft enough for babies to chew or gum.

Experimenting with New Flavors

Babies like variety as much as adults do. Try a range of foods to expose those fresh taste buds to many flavors. Don’t be afraid to try out breakfast, lunch, dinner, or snack-time favorites, at any time of day! One mom started her baby on small, easily grasped and chewed foods like chunked avocado, sweet potato, and banana, eventually adding steamed squash, pears, and apples — anything she would eat herself, but prepped for few-to-no teeth. And when your baby has graduated to foods that require more chewing, consider scrambled eggs, steamed green beans, or even wheat toast.

The idea behind experimenting like this is that you’re helping your baby get ready to join the rest of the family in eating fresh, healthy foods.If you introduce baby now to a version of your family’s regular meals, you won’t have to force a second transition later to “grown-up” food.

Finally,don’t forget that your baby might make a “yuck” face when introduced to a new flavor. This is more a reaction to the discomfort of new things than an indicator of his flavor preferences. Keep offering it; with repetition, babies often warm up to new tastes.

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What is a doula?

The word “doula” comes from the ancient Greek meaning “a woman who serves” and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period.

Studies have shown that when doulas attend birth, labors are shorter with fewer complications, babies are healthier and they breastfeed more easily.

A Birth Doula

Recognizes birth as a key experience the mother will remember all her life
Understands the physiology of birth and the emotional needs of a woman in labor
Assists the woman in preparing for and carrying out her plans for birth
Stays with the woman throughout the labor
Provides emotional support, physical comfort measures and an objective viewpoint, as well as helping the woman get the information she needs to make informed decisions
Facilitates communication between the laboring woman, her partner and her clinical care providers
Perceives her role as nurturing and protecting the woman’s memory of the birth experience
Allows the woman’s partner to participate at his/her comfort level

Research evidence shows that the quality services of a postpartum doula can ease the transition that comes with the addition of a baby to a family, improve parental satisfaction and reduce the risk of mood disorders.

A Postpartum Doula

Offers education, companionship and nonjudgmental support during the postpartum fourth trimester
Assists with newborn care, family adjustment, meal preparation and light household tidying
Offers evidence-based information on infant feeding, emotional and physical recovery from birth, infant soothing and coping skills for new parents and makes appropriate referrals when necessary

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*This post is not meant to promote nor dissuade from using a doula, nor are we advocating for any specific doula agency. It is meant to be informative on a topic in which many of our mothers have shown an interest.

15 Great Play Date Ideas

You’ve set a date and hand-picked the perfect crew. All that’s left is to find something to do! Whether you’ve invited besties only or planned a new faces get-together, these creative play date pick-me-ups will help you go beyond the everyday gather and gab.

1. Be crafty. Need a reason to finally start in on those adorable kid-friendly crafts filling up your Pinterest board? Make one (or more) the focus of your next play date gathering. Click here for ideas for awesome autumn leaf crafts. Set up materials ahead of time to keep things on track. Then cut the kids loose.

2. Happy hour. Invite the play group to belly up to the neighborhood bar (i.e.: your place) for a pre-nap happy hour of the virgin variety. Grab a mocktail recipe and shake up some fun. Bonus points if you serve with mini drink umbrellas!

3. Toy swap. One tot’s trash is another tot’s treasure, right? Have the little ones bring an unused toy to swap for something new to them. Let parents join the fun; they can bring accessories like jewelry, scarves or ties to trade out, too.

4. Paint the town. Transform this parents’-night-out favorite into an at-home activity for petit Picassos. Grab some smocks or old t-shirts and set up a few finger painting stations around the kitchen table for invitees. Get the grownups in the action by offering them small canvases to paint on with acrylics. Plan for a mess and then let it go!

5. Animal house. No one parties like toddlers with their stuffed toys. Transform your living room into an animal sanctuary complete with an animal hospital, dog park and petting station. Then let the little ones and their furry friends explore the animal kingdom.

6. Do it like the Dowager. Indulge your Downton obsession and play Countess Grantham by hosting an afternoon tea for little lords and ladies. Dressing up is part of the deal in this play date twist, with fancy hats, formal ties and white gloves topping the countess-approved dress list. Be sure to whip up some tea and PB&J finger sandwiches for this grand occasion. Pinkies up!

7. Time for a field trip. Is there a new museum, restaurant, or play space you’ve been dying to explore? Invite everyone to join you at the newest, hottest off-site location. Exploring unchartered waters is always better with friends!

8. Sprinkles on top. With the wintertime just around the corner, it’s a great time to host a cookie decorating play group. We suggest rolling, cutting and baking sugar cookies ahead of time for this one. Then set out sprinkles, jimmies and an array of colorful icings in prep bowls for the mini baking crew. Clean kitchen? Probably not. Delicious cookies? For sure!

9. Throw a leftover party. Every parent has them packed away somewhere. Those odds and ends leftover from years of birthday bashes where more than eight but less than 16 (or 24 or 32 …) kids were invited. Dig through the cupboards and clear out your closet stash to find old themed party plates, hats, favors and more. Then send out an invite and use the unearthed hodgepodge of goodies to throw one sweet play date. Less mess and more friends is always a reason to celebrate!

10. Walk on the wild side. Plan your meet-up at a local park or forest preserve with stroller-friendly trails. It’s a chance for the kids to get their run on, collect colorful leaves or play hide and seek among the trees. For parents, it’s a chance to enjoy some fresh air and outdoor fun.

11. If you build it…They will come. Set up construction stations for budding builders with LEGOs, Duplos, wooden blocks and more on the family room floor. Then let them construct while parents catch up on the latest neighborhood news.

12. Nail it. Get out the polish for a mini-mani party. Have friends bring their favorite color. You set out manicure tools, lotions and some sparkly embellishments. Parents can paint alongside the kids or play manicurist for the group.

13. Planes, Trains and Automobiles. It’s the time of year when cardboard boxes start arriving on doorsteps. Start stockpiling them now for this play date activity that allows adults to enjoy some uninterrupted conversation, while the wee ones let imaginations run wild with their blank cardboard canvases. You supply markers, glue, stickers and doodads, and let the little inventors take care of the rest.

14. Host a book club. Hosting a book club for little literatis is one more way to gather the gang with a purpose. Check out this article on how to host a kids’ book club.

15. Have a snowball fight. You don’t need snow for this indoor, year-round activity. Use cotton balls, marshmallows or even crumpled paper for this playful twist on a winter fave. Older kids can incorporate forts and hiding spots into their play, while toddlers will giggle by just tossing soft “snow” balls at each other. Turn down the heat–coats and mittens required!

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Easing Parenting Disagreements

My partner and I were raised differently, so we disagree on parenting a lot. How do we get on the same page?

Every couple is going to clash on a few of the millions of decisions they need to make together. “There’s no one right way to do almost anything as a parent,” says Shoshana Bennett, a clinical psychologist. “It’s really important to respect each other’s ideas. That doesn’t mean you have to agree, but you should avoid being critical.”

Ask, “Is this a big deal?”

If you disagree on something little, like how to dress baby or whether to bathe him in the sink or the tub, it’s not worth a fight. “If it’s a huge safety or health issue, then it’s important to discuss it,” Bennett says, “but arguments between parents typically aren’t about whether to put a seatbelt on your kids. They’re more about parenting style.”

Stay calm and listen

Don’t flip out as soon as you hear your partner’s take. React as calmly as you can. If it’s 2 a.m. and baby’s screaming, table the discussion for daylight hours when you feel sane enough to have a civil conversation. Then, ask why. You might find your partner has a good reason for his stance.

Give your partner equal footing

Accept that your partner has a different style than you do, like he lets baby play independently (while supervised) and you like to play along with baby. Bennett says it’s actually good for babies to be exposed to different people who speak in different intonations, point out different things to baby and involve baby in different activities — all this helps baby developmentally.

Start fresh

Most of us swear we’re going to raise our kids differently when we become parents. Then we become parents… our parents. Why not focus on the fact that you’re a new family, and develop new ways to interact together and start new traditions together?

Expert: Shoshana Bennett, PhD, is a clinical psychologist specializing in family issues

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